A new chapter

So, here we are. Finding a new normal in between middle of the night feedings and getting used to

owning a car again. Two big transitions in the span of two months. Back in May, after a whirlwind six weeks of selling furniture and saying goodbye to dear friends that had become family, we packed up all we own into our well traveled suitcases and flew the opposite direction over the Pacific to move our family back to Washington State. And then, as if a huge international move was not enough transition, five weeks later we welcomed our son, Reece Henry, into our lives. Like I said, we are finding a new normal. Trying, grasping, hoping, struggling, living, finding, and becoming a new normal. 

How do you sum up four years lived in another culture? How do you process the countless lives you became part of and the friends you still dearly miss? How do you ever eat Chinese food again? 

When I first returned Stateside over four months ago, I received comments such as, "I bet you are glad to be back." This was, and still is, a hard question to answer. Because I am glad. I am thankful God was gracious and allowed me to have my son in the States. I am thankful family is here to support us and be part of my children's lives. I appreciate the efficiency of America and being able to communicate in my first language. But I am also sad. I miss China. I miss my friends and church community. I miss our amazing Ayi. I miss the convenience of living in a city where fresh fruit and vegetable stands dot the sidewalk. I miss the freedom of my scooter.

It is hard to see the forest for the trees sometimes. Big changes like this usually prompt a questioning of what God is doing and why it all happened so fast. I still can't believe we have already been Stateside for four months. However, we see His fingerprints all over this move. We sensed the changes coming, so when circumstances drastically changed we were able to confidently approach God and see where He was leading us (of course, not before we did a little freaking out and others graciously directed our attention to the obvious). 

And so, here we find ourselves. Steven started a new job on September 1st with our home church as the Executive Pastor, we bought a new-to-us car (yay for mini vans!), and we are starting the process of looking for a house in the Tri Cities area. New beginnings, exciting changes, but we serve the same God. He knew what we needed before we needed it and He hasn't changed, even if our new normal has. And I am so grateful for that. 

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.

James 1:17

5 years...

This weekend was our fifth wedding anniversary.  Time flies fast!  And now look at us - living in China.  Who knew?  Just six and a half years ago we started dating.  *Sigh*  I love looking back at pictures and seeing how much we have experienced together.  We are blessed.  

September 2006, when we first started dating

China, April 2007

When Nala and The Hubby found each other, Summer 2007

Right after he asked me to marry him, Mt. Rainier, July 2007

Engagement pictures, Fall 2007

January 5th, 2008

October 2008 with Nala & Olive

Christmas 2008

China, April 2009

California, September 2009

December 2009

Hawaii, June 2010

Oregon Coast, August 2010

China, November 2010

Wisconsin, June 2011

Oregon Coast, August 2011

Christmas 2011

4th Wedding Anniversary in Las Vegas, January 2012 (look at how long my hair was!)

China, April 2012

Pikes Peak, CO, June 2012

5th Wedding Anniversary, Hangzhou, China

Food: What I've been making

**UPDATE 10/15 - Links added in for ones I have!**

**I was going to add links to all these recipes, however our Internet is running super slow and so you are lucky you all got the link for the first one. Boo. Sorry! If it gets better in the next few days I will add the rest of them in. If you have links to any of these recipes, please leave them in the comments! Thanks.**

Yes, I thought it was time for a post about food. With all the changes in what is readily available, I've had to remake my "go to" meal list. Not a bad thing, but definitely time consuming. These days, I've taken to Pinterest to help me find simple dinners & desserts - and it has not disappointed (though I have yet to try most of those). Here's a rundown of the successful & not-so-successful recipes I've attempted...

Cheeseburger Soup. Or otherwise known as the-most-expensive-soup-I've-ever-made. Why? At the time I made this (just over 10 days in), I still hadn't found the best place to buy hamburger and ended up paying almost $10 for one pound. Yikes! Add to that, $5 for 8oz of cheese and $3 celery and you have one expensive recipe. However, I am willing to forgive myself because 1) I was desperate to make something I knew & loved and 2) it turned out excellent. 

Pasta. Seriously the easiest meal to make here. Penne and spaghetti are cheap & I can get a large can of Hunts or Del Monte pasta sauce for around $3. Just throw in some sautéed veggies & hamburger (no longer the expensive kind thankfully) and you have a meal! Sides for this have included garlic sautéed bok choy, bread, steamed asparagus, and corn on the cob. The corn was excellent, but it has since went out of season (I think, because I haven't seen it for a few weeks). However, just yesterday we found asparagus and I know there's no way that is in season here locally...so, not sure how that works.

Speaking of veggies, I buy most of mine from the supermarket (because when I'm there on the second milk run for the week it's fast and easy). However, the last few weeks I have started going around the corner to a couple of fruit & veggies stands/trucks that sell great stuff. I had to go to several different places to get exactly what I needed, but it was good produce. 

Let's see...what else...

Stewed tomatoes. Yup, I did stew my own tomatoes. Which is much cheaper than paying $4 a can. I actually have about 25 tomatoes in the fridge waiting to be stewed. I need to get on that!

Pasta casserole. Did I say pasta was easy? Well I used some of the aforementioned stewed tomatoes, some butternut squash (at least I'm pretty sure that's what is was), some onions & mushrooms and made a GIANT casserole that fed us for five days (at least). This was a "go to" in the states, however usually I use zucchini & brussel sprouts. I could not find either, so I swapped for the mushrooms & butternut squash. It worked perfectly. 

Taco salad. So easy. There's an amazing import store in Shanghai called City Shop & they deliver to Nanjing on Fridays. I got a big container of fresh greens from them for $1.50 (like two of the pre washed salads you buy packaged in the states) & found decent tortilla chips at Carrefour.  Add in a jar of salsa from City Shop and taco meat (I brought over my own seasoning) and voila - awesome taco salads. Delish.

Apple cake. It just sounds good. So yummy. I got "green" apples from the market (I don't think they were Granny Smiths, they weren't sour enough) and whipped up a yummy loaf of apple cake. It was so good! I didn't have vegetable oil & the recipe called for applesauce, so I also made applesauce and used it to also substitute for the oil. Making the applesauce was also easy. Just peeled, cored & chopped the apple and cooked it on the stove with some sugar and water and then mashed it up. Simple! Who knew? Although I was a little disappointed mine looked more brown than the yellow I saw in all the pictures of homemade applesauce on Pinterest. The cake was a huge hit with everyone. Even our Chinese friends loved it!

Meatloaf. Yup, another "go to" in the states. This one I only substituted the type of BBQ sauce I use (yes, I put BBQ sauce in my meatloaf). It was a little runny, but tasted excellent. 

Orzo with Parmesan & Basil. I think this is the Hubby's favorite side dish. It's just so yummy! I was excited to find that City Shop had orzo & I found a block of Parmesan at an import store. So happy to find Parmesan cheese! 

Cookies. So far I've made no-bake cookies & the amazing Wallace cookie.  No-bake was an easy choice before I had an oven. The Wallace cookie was made possible by a local friend having butterscotch chips at her bakery! Yay! 

So there you have it, a little run down on the yummy foods we have been eating over here. I feel like we hit our stride a few weeks ago making life a little less chaotic and cooking a little more feasible. I'm so thankful for all the helpful friends who have advised where to find things and what to look for.  There are also a few helpful blogs that have aided me so far. 

Oh, and another blessing - we got a free oven! Ok, we're just borrowing it, indefinitely. One of our friends here knew a family that went back home to the states and let her keep their oven "until they return". She doesn't use it (she's Chinese, they don't really bake) and so offered for us to have it. I'm not sure when her friends are coming back, but it sounds like they left awhile ago. The bonus is that it is the biggest size you can get here, almost full sized (one large cookie sheet fits snugly side-to-side). Extra blessing! 

What we have been up to...

I can think of a million to things to write about...but that would take me a very long time!  And I'm sure you all don't want to read through a book.  So I will give it to you in pictures, because, as we all know, each one is worth a thousand words.  

Let's see, what have we done so far...

Shopping, lots and lots of shopping.  This is how to get to the grocery store...by going down!  The Hubby wanted to take this picture of the man pushing all the carts on the moving ramp (like an escalator, but flat).  One of his favorite things about China are their shopping carts (I know, weird), they spin on all four wheels and are magnetic so they "stick" to the ramps!  Since it is so crowded here, many of the stores are below ground.  This one, Carrefour, has some import stuff like pasta, pasta sauce and cornflakes!  Carrefour also has butter, cheese and milk that the Hubby approves of (he's kind of a milk snob).  

We got an electric scooter.  The picture above is actually what happened while we were getting our scooter.  Our friend was helping us and the local TV station came over to interview her on why her foreign friends were buying the scooter, how much it was, how fast it could go and if she would buy a similar scooter.  My favorite part was that she had just started eating a cracker, and so her mouth was full the entire interview!  It was an adventure.

We did end up buying that electric scooter.  It can go 70km on one charge & will get up to speeds of 25mph!  Yup, she's a thing of beauty.  And the Hubby loves driving her around town.  Every chance he gets, "do we need to take the scooter?"  To our friends, "can I give you a ride home on our scooter?"  I have yet to drive it.  Lessons will come & I'm sure a very entertaining blog post will follow.

Coffee flavored Pocky & Chinese coffee.  Enough said.  This is truly the breakfast of champions.

And I got a coffee maker!!!  Hallelujah!  In China, there are several websites you can order from and they deliver (like ebay, but cooler).  There's a local store online that delivered this baby to my door for 230RMB.  Sweet.  And my dear friend who we inherited our apartment from was kind enough to leave a coffee grinder.  So thankful!  You may all start sending me coffee.  Seriously, I can't afford to buy coffee in China.

We went shopping at Ikea and bought this awesome table & 6 chairs...

And this couch!  It's nice to have something to actually sit on at home. :-)  I also just discovered that Ikea has an iPad app with their store catalogue on it - watch out!  

We had to pay a small fee (like $1), to get our mailbox lock changed so we could use it (we didn't have a key).  We opened the mailbox to find six years worth of mail!!  No, I'm not kidding.  Our friend who lived here before just used to grab her stuff off the top and pull it through the small slot.  Too funny!  Anyone want a newspaper from 2006? 

Last night we had our first volunteer meeting for the leadership forum we partner in running.  There were several options for snacks to serve to the students.  We ended up getting Oreos, crackers and chips.  The flavors of chips here are, well, different.  If you can't read the picture well, the two flavors listed above are Mexican Tomato Chicken Flavor and Italian Red Meat Flavor.  I think we ended up getting the Mexican flavored chips and, no, I didn't try them.

Today, the weather was gorgeous and I ventured out with some friends to find a baking shop.  This is at a plaza near downtown.  Blue skies!  What an awesome day.  Thankful for great weather and great friends to share an outing with.  Tonight we are off to meet up with some other friends to [finally] see the new Batman movie.  Yay! 

So there you have it.  A little update in photos of our time here so far.  What have all you been up to?

Transition Post Part I: Leaving Pets Behind

One of the hardest decisions we have made to date is whether or not to bring our dog, Coco.  We actually had two dogs, a Golden Retriever named Nala & Coco, a black lab mix.  We didn't consider it an option to us to bring both, and out of the two Nala had more health concerns and loved people a little too much for your typical Chinese.  We love our dogs, but we didn't want our Chinese friends to not want to come visit because our dog would maul them with love at the door (which is Nala's forte).  We easily found a great home for Nala and we know she is happy and healthy and with the perfect family.

Coco is a different story.  At first (back in January), we thought we would bring her.  Many people who move overseas bring their pets.  Since it's not uncommon, we figured it would be possible and didn't really look into the different options or cost.  In March we started doing some research.  Apparently, many people who bring their pets with them when they move overseas pay a lot of money for it.  To bring a pet yourself actually doesn't cost that much.  However, you have to fly with an airline that will allow you to bring your pet as "checked luggage", which has restrictions on what time of year you can travel.  Also, in China, when you land at the airport, you have to take your pet through customs and transfer them to a quarantine facility.  From what we read it's doable, but definitely a hassle.  Basically, you have to really know what you are doing.  Also, we are looking to fly in the summer which rules out most airlines for bringing your pet as checked baggage - it's just too hot.

Coco just being herself - a little weird

So, we started looking into other options.  The option that seems to be the most widely used is to hire a pet travel company which specializes in transporting pets around the world.  Sounds awesome, right?  They tell you what paperwork you need, how to prepare your pet for travel, take them to the airport, put them on a special "cargo" plane, have their representatives meet your pet at each layover and the final destination, take your pet through customs & the quarantine process and basically deliver them to your door in your new home.  The catch?  It's expensive.  We're talking $5,000 expensive.  Yikes!  We do not have that kind of money to bring our dog with us.  We definitely weren't planning on it and hadn't budgeted for it, plus that's a little steep for us to justify bringing her.  Don't get me wrong, we totally respect people who pay that.  But I'm going to go out on a limb and assume most people are maybe working for a company who pays it for them (as a moving expense) or they were better prepared than us and actually budgeted for the cost.

In light of the $5,000, hassle-free price tag, we processed through all our options.  One that we did consider was an option at about $3,000 where we still use a company for once we land in China but we put her on a cargo flight ourselves (kind of an in-between the other two).  However, we just didn't see it fitting well with our timing or our budget.  All in all, in the end we decided that as much as we love Coco, it just wasn't going to work out to bring her.  It was really sad to come to the realization that Coco wouldn't be coming with us.  We had really hoped to bring her, to take a piece of home with us.  It was a hard call, but a necessary one.

Nala with her favorite toy - a tennis ball

Fast forward past our road trip and we came back home thinking that we possibly had a new home for her.  My aunt & uncle had been watching her and she was livin' life on the farm chasing things and playing outside, basically every dog's dream...however, this wasn't exactly Coco's dream.  As much as she loves to be outdoors, she loves to be indoors even more and it wasn't fitting with her new "farm dog" lifestyle. So, back to square one!  It was really stressing me out to have her back with us at my parents' house.  They already have three dogs & adding Coco to the mix was just a little bit too much.  One desperate email later and the clouds parted, angels sang and the perfect home was found!  A family adopted her who had been looking for a dog for a few months now.  It is the perfect fit as she gets to be indoors most of the day, go for walks and play outside with their six year old son.  I'm also pretty sure she sleeps on the bed. :-)  

The silver lining of saying goodbye to our pets is knowing they have great homes.  There are many things about transitioning to life overseas that makes leaving hard.  Selling all our worldly things was, in part, freeing.  Having to adopt out our two dogs we had for several years, not so much.  Knowing that they are each in a family who loves them and is spoiling them rotten as I type this is a blessing.  And the Hubby?  He's already talking about what kind of dog he would like to adopt in China.  I say, let's give ourselves a few months before jumping back on the pet-ownership wagon.  But those adorable little fluff balls in the pet market?  They are really cute...

A paradox & a pair of ducks

While learning how to transition overseas, many things can be explained in paradoxes.  We are excited to start a new life in a new city yet we are sad to leave family and friends.  There will be awesome Chinese food yet we will miss a really good hamburger and excellent Mexican food.  Good and bad seems to go together as we process about moving abroad.  Recently, we have acquired a common language that has helped us to process through this paradox of emotions we have been experiencing.  Introducing our new friends "yay duck" and "yuck duck" which makes up a "pair-of-ducks".  

Using this common language has helped us identify things that we see as joys and others that are struggles.  It has helped us to process through the fact that in this transition, and when we move to China, it will not all be good - we will have yuck ducks.  On the flip side, it will not all be bad because we will also have yay ducks even in the midst of hard days.  Yay ducks and yuck ducks travel together, and it's a good thing.  Yay for new friends, yuck for leaving old ones.  Yay for bikes rides in a nearby park, yuck for bikes rides in the rain.  Yay for purging unused stuff as we prepare to move, yuck for having to box up some of our favorite dishes.  In regards to this weekend at Rocky Mountain National Park, yay for awesome views and time with friends and yuck for the crazy wind.  As you can see, the list could go on and on.  

What are your current yay ducks in life?  Your yuck ducks?  Do you think having a common language would help you and your family/friends/coworkers process through how you are feeling about certain situations?  Feel free to leave a comment sharing your yay duck or yuck duck for the day - but remember, they usually travel in pairs.

Where's your identity?

Over the past several weeks, as we have been in transition living with my parents and traveling around, I have realized that something is missing.  Without a home, a place that is mine, I'm less...well, less stressed!  You would think it would be the opposite right?  Without a place to call home one would assume that the stress level would rise as a result of living in transition.   However, that is not the case.  Instead I feel less stressed.  Odd?  Maybe.  But I think I have figured out why.

Last week I saw a video (part of a marriage series), that addressed the "non important" things in our lives and how we let those things cause conflict in our marriage.  You know, the non-important, worldly things that rise to a level of importance so high that to shirk certain duties would be considered treason against holy matrimony.  Oh, you need an example?  How about cleaning.  Is cleaning good?  Yes.  Does it provide order and hygenic living that allows you to feel at peace about counters, floors and the like being clean?  Yes.  Is it important enough that when a certain someone doesn't vacuum/unload the dishwasher/clean the bathroom the way you asked it calls for resentment and anger?  No.  It's really not.     

I say it is not important because in reality, tasks like cleaning should be secondary in our lives.  The important things - putting each other first, spending time together, listening to each other, being kind, having patience, serving one another - should always be a priority.  But in reality that doesn't happen.  Instead, when my husband usually comes home from work I'm deep in the middle of cooking, attempting to clean the kitchen at the same time.  I'm not really listening to him as he shares about his day or is trying to process something with me.  Nope, instead in my mind I'm worried if the chicken will be done at the same time as the potatoes so both can go on the table together.  Do you think my hubby cares if the chicken is done a few minutes late?  Not at all.  He would rather have my attention for five minutes.  Need another example?  How about insisting that the bathroom has to be spotless before company shows up instead of taking ten minutes to unwind together over a glass of wine.  Or getting mad when the dishwasher isn't unloaded when I get home from work and he had Friday off.  Really?  Is it worth getting upset about?  I used to think it was.  I felt totally justified in my anger that he should have taken the time to at least unload the dishwasher.  You know what?  It's not important.  Instead he spent all day working on our finances to make sure that we had everything in order so our bills get paid on time.  But I never took time to realize that...

In short, not having a house to clean and keep in order has made me, um, nicer?  Weird.  I'm not saying that I used to go around mad all the time, because I'm really not that kind of person.  But I would get worked up about weird stuff and be jumpy and anxious about "keeping house" because that's what was supposed to be important, or so I thought. 

Watching that video really made me think about what I consider important - and more importantly, made me think about where I find my identity.  If I was getting upset and feeling anxious about "keeping house", I'm pretty sure that means that at least part of my identity was wrapped up in how my house looked and how good I was at keeping it all together.  I don't think that's how it is supposed to be.  

It's funny how the Lord reveals certain things at unexpected times to teach us, shape us and grow us.  I never saw how highly I held the "non important" things in my life before, how it was affecting my marriage and how it had became part of my identity.  My prayer now is that I will have the grace and the courage to maintain this new outlook as we transition overseas.  Apparently living overseas is actually more stressful!  There are many more things to get worked up about.  If I can work now towards eliminating one of them, maybe there's hope for a happier tomorrow.  

I haven't figured it all out, I learn as I go - both feet in, up to my neck.  But I do know that when we put our identity in something, once it is removed something else takes it's place.  I hope that as we walk forward through this transition, that my identity is not displaced to other "non-important" or worldly things.  That instead, I put my identity not on what is seen, but what is unseen.  For this world is temporary, but Christ - He's eternal!  

Caution: big transitions ahead

There are no warning signs in life, but sometimes I feel there should be. Especially caution signs. "Caution: your life is about to get crazy"; "caution: surprise immediately ahead"; and, as stated in the title of this post, "caution: big transitions ahead."

You would think I saw this coming. I knew we were moving out of our house and having renters move in. I knew we were moving in with my parents (and sisters and aunt). I knew we were flying to China for 17 days this month. I really did know all these things, yet, it seems I missed the fact that the next four to six months of our lives will be in perpetual transition. Transition in where we live, our jobs, our belongings - new culture, new lifestyle. You name it, it is probably changing. And all this just started to sink in. It's not that I am adverse to change. I like actually like change. It's the fact that we don't have a permanent "home", a place that just belongs to us. That's hard for me. What am I doing as a conscious effort to stay sane through this whole endeavor? Staying positive for one. But that can only get you so far, you know? And who has the energy to be positive all the time? Not me. So instead, I rest. Rest in knowing that Someone has it all under control. There is a purpose, one greater than our own. And when I rest in the knowledge of that promise I am filled with great peace. My cup overflows and I am cared for.

Friday we fly to China for a little over two weeks to see some friends, start the transition into our new jobs and where we will be living when we move in August, and do a little sight seeing. But until I am on that plane it won't feel real. And when that plane takes off and the realization that the next step in this long transition has occurred, I will stop, take a moment, and rest. Thankful that in the midst of all this chaos and craziness I have an 11 hour plane ride to just...rest.

How do you prepare for big transitions?

The adventure begins

This month has gone by a little too quickly and we now find ourselves with less than two weeks to pack our lives up into boxes and move it all out.  It's so weird to think that this is the beginning.  The beginning of something exciting and grand and awesome.  Full of adventure and literally things that we cannot even imagine now.  We are moving to China.  That's really far from our current lives in the Tri Cities!  

We have lived here for four years and have rooted ourselves, not deeply (always knowing that we wouldn't be here long), but deep enough for the transition to be bittersweet.  Friends old and new and family live in the area and we see them frequently, it will be hard (bitter?) to leave them behind.  Although there are dear friends we will see more by moving to China and that is just as sweet if not sweeter.  We have put blood, sweat and tears into our home, remodeling and making it just the way we want it.  In the past two months we have done more in the downstairs than we have in the four years previous!  But isn't that how it works?  And I don't think it's bad at all.  In fact it's good.  Good because we have a purpose, there is a goal.  April 1st we have renters moving in and now is the time to fix the things that are broken, slap on some paint and move on.  

We switched over to this blog to share our adventure of moving to China and the transition over the next few months it will take to get there.  I believe that when you start new chapters in life, you need a new place to put them.  I do the same with journals it seems, each time I go through a big transition I start a new journal.  Fresh pages, new thoughts...it just feels right.  And so does starting a new blog.  We hope you enjoy hearing about our lives overseas and the journey it will take us to get there.  Our hope is to share our lives in a way that you can relate to and feel a part of.  Just one more piece to taking you all with us on this awesome ride!  

Thanks for taking time to stop by the blog and we hope you continue to join us as we explore China and her people and choose to be intentional with our lives.  And if you ever get an itch to fly over the Pacific, please look us up!  Playing tour guide to many visitors is one role we know we will enjoy.